Jennifer Crumbley, mom of Michigan school shooter, tries to humanize her embattled family

Jennifer Crumbley believed that her job as a parent was to protect her son from harm — not having to protect others from him.

For the first time, the mother of Oxford High School mass shooter Ethan Crumbley spoke on her own behalf Thursday, taking the stand in her historic criminal trial, telling jurors that she never believed her son was a threat to others nor saw any signs that he needed mental health treatment. She also addressed one of the key allegations in this case: that she refused to bring her son home from school after being summoned over a violent drawing he had made.

"There was never a time when I refused to take him home," Jennifer Crumbley told jurors. "If he wanted to go home, I would have taken him."

Just hours after the meeting with school officials, her son killed four students and injured seven other people.

"I wish he would have killed us instead," Jennifer Crumbley testified.

Jennifer Crumbley seeks to portray ordinary family life

Throughout the trial, prosecutors have painted Jennifer Crumbley as a neglectful parent who ignored warning signs before her son gunned down his classmates on Nov. 30, 2021. On Thursday, the defense tried to flip that narrative, as Jennifer Crumbley, who is facing involuntary manslaughter charges, testified and about their family life, her parenting decisions and her son.

Her attorney, Shannon Smith, showed photos of the Crumbleys on vacations to Sleeping Bear Dunes and Florida, camping, apple picking. There were also pictures of their young son holding his chinchilla, petting a horse and hanging out on a houseboat with his friend. Jennifer Crumbley testified the family played board games, swam together and she got her son into skiing.

"Really just normal stuff," she testified.

In school, she said, her son struggled with his grades and sometimes missed assignments. The mother testified that he had expressed anxiety over taking tests and she texted another mom at one point saying he had "been acting depressed" and she thought it was because of his grades.

But Jennifer Crumbley testified she never felt he needed mental health treatment.

An argument over grades the night before the shooting

"There was a couple of times where Ethan expressed anxiety over taking tests, anxiety about what he was going to do after high school whether it was college, military, so he expressed those concerns to me," she said, "but not to a level where I felt he needed to go see a psychologist or mental health professional right away."

School officials have testified about several incidents involving Ethan Crumbley during the school year of the shooting, but Jennifer Crumbley said she was never told about red flags involving her son, including that he was falling asleep in class, he had written an autobiography calling his family a mistake or that he was acting depressed and sad in Spanish class.

The night before the shooting, Jennifer Crumbley said she and her husband had argued with their son about his failing geometry grades and told him that if they didn't improve, he could not go to the shooting range, a hobby he enjoyed. The next day, he made a drawing in class depicting a gun and the message: "The thoughts won't stop. Help me."

When she and her husband arrived at the school after being called about the drawing, the first version of the drawing they saw had been doctored, with the gun and alarming message scribbled out. The Oxford High dean of students had testified that the shooter altered the drawing in an effort to stay out of trouble. At first, Jennifer Crumbley testified, she was angry, thinking that her son was acting out because of their argument the night before. Then she saw the original drawing and was concerned.

She testified that a school counselor expressed concerns about their son being sad and that being around peers might be better for him than being home alone. She said school officials did not feel her son was a risk and gave the teen the option of staying in school. Her testimony was consistent with what school officials told jurors earlier in the week.

The teen wanted to stay, so he did.

Texts about demons

Jennifer Crumbley's testimony included extensive discussion of text messages that prosecutors have suggested she ignored from her son about the house being haunted and seeing a demon while she and her husband were riding their horses.

Her lawyer asked her about a text message in which Ethan Crumbley said he was seeing a demon throwing bowls. Jennifer Crumbley said she couldn't recall the text, but noted that she doesn't find it concerning because it was part of joking culture they had at their house.

She testified about other times when her son texted about weird stuff happening in the house, hearing someone flush the toilet and clothes flying off of shelves. She said the family even had names for the house ghost.

"He's been convinced that our house has been haunted," she told jurors, noting her son played with a Ouija board with a friend. He also often took videos of him opening a door, and saying, "See, it's slamming."

"It was him messing around," she testified. "He only did it when we weren't home. He got bored."

Her testimony included a discussion of texts she sent her husband stating she was worried about her son, wanted to know where their son was and stating she was worried her son might do something stupid. She explained that she was always worried about where her son was. She didn't worry that he would hurt himself, but she feared he may walk home from school on a different route and not come home.

She also talked about a tracking app she had for her husband and son.

"I was always worried about him," she said.

Jennifer Crumbley became choked up as her attorney showed a photo of her son before the shooting, particularly a photo of him at the front door before his first day of eighth grade. As he got older, she said, it was harder to get him in a photo.

In a Facebook post from Nov. 26, 2021, four days before the shooting, the family was together cutting down their Christmas tree. Her son and husband were laughing. On Thanksgiving, relatives came over and played games.

"Did anything seem strange or off about your son?" Smith asked.

"No," Crumbley responded.

A trip to the gun range

Crumbley testified about going to a shooting range with her son on Nov. 27, just three days before the high school massacre. She said her husband got the gun ready for her — he took the lock off — and she went because it was a rare occasion. Her son typically went to the range with his dad, she said.

"It was a fun day," she testified. "He's never asked just me to go, and I felt good about it."

After the trip to the shooting range, she said she and her son returned home, James Crumbley told her he put the gun away. The next day, she got a call from the school that her son was researching bullets.

That day, Crumbley said a school official called her and left a message that the situation had been taken care of, that her son had been spoken to. The official wished her a happy holiday. Smith then asked Crumbley to explain the text she sent her son: "LOL I'm not mad ... You have to learn not to get caught."

Crumbley told the jury that it was an ongoing joke in her family that she was able to get away with stuff when she was in high school. She said the school's phone call was not alarming or concerning, so she didn't respond.

'I didn't think he had shot anyone'

On Nov. 30, 2021, after having met a school counselor and the dean of students at Oxford High, Jennifer Crumbley texted her son to see whether he was OK. "You can talk to us," she wrote.

"After we left that meeting, I knew that he was sad about things, and I just wanted to let him that he can talk to us about anything," she told the jury. "I just wanted to make sure I opened that door, to let him know that we're there for him, that we love him."

She was taken aback by his response to her text, writing her back: "I love you."

"He's at that age where it's hard to get the I love yous back out of him," she testified.

Then came the mind-numbing phone call. Her husband called her at work and told her there was an active shooter at Oxford High.

Jennifer Crumbley testified about driving and joining a caravan racing to the school. Her husband had been to the house and discovered the 9mm gun he had bought for their son a few days before was missing.

That's when she texted her son: "Don't do it."

"I didn't think he had shot anyone," she told the jury. "I thought he was going to kill himself."

It wasn't until later that day she learned of the fatalities — while sitting in the back of a patrol car.

On Thursday, Jennifer Crumbley wept at the defense table as Oakland County Sheriff's Detective Lt. Timothy Willis described the wounds suffered by the teens killed in the school shooting as prosecutors played surveillance video of the shooting.

The prosecution asked Willis why officers had to run past some of the victims. Willis explained that in their training for active shooters they are trained to “drive up right to the door” if they have to and go in, head toward gunshots and eliminate the shooter. Because the situation was active, officers can't stop and render aid.

Willis said: “I know those officers and that is the hardest thing they’ve ever had to do in their life.”

Parents were worried about threats

Jennifer Crumbley testified that after the shooting, she and her husband feared for their safety. Her Facebook messages were "blowing up with threats," as was her work email, she testified.

"I was pretty scared that people would hurt us," she said.

On Thursday, prosecutors presented banking records for the Crumbleys, showing that, after the shooting, $2,000 was withdrawn by Jennifer Crumbley from Flagstar Bank on Dec. 2, 2021, and the next day she withdrew another $4,000. Willis testified that on Nov. 30, they transferred $3,000 from Ethan Crumbley’s savings account.

Jennifer Crumbley testified about draining her son's bank account, telling jurors that she often transferred money into that account. Her father, she said, advised getting cash from family accounts in case authorities froze them.

She also testified about fleeing her house and staying at a hotel, saying she had heard that charges were coming, but wasn't sure yet. Because law enforcement had already seized their phones, she said they went to get new ones because they didn't have access to their bank accounts on prepaid phones, given two-factor authentication requirements.

Then she got a call from a friend who owned an art studio in Detroit. He was checking on the couple and invited them to come to the studio and offered to buy them sandwiches, Jennifer Crumbley testified.

By then, Oakland County authorities had announced that the parents were going to be charged. Jennifer Crumbley testified that she was "freaked out" and had never faced charges of such magnitude.

She told jurors she debated returning to a hotel in Auburn Hills, not knowing they were the target of a manhunt. She opted to stay at the art studio, saying she and her husband hadn't slept in four days and took four Xanax each on the night before their arrest.

When Smith asked why she and her husband didn't just turn themselves in to the police, or report to the courthouse that day, Crumbley said: "I was not aware that we could go to court that afternoon," adding she did not go to the police department on her own because she didn't feel safe. She feared public critics showing up, so she waited to hear from her attorney to instruct her on what to do.

'My child harmed and killed people'

During her testimony, Crumbley's attorney asked her whether she believed she was a failure as a parent — as she had stated in a message to her ex-lover during the aftermath of the shooting.

Crumbley said she doesn't see herself as a failure now, but at that point of time in her life, "I felt bad that Ethan was sad. I just felt I had failed him."

She then talked about the impact her son's actions have had on her as a mother, and how she never believed her son was a danger to others.

"As a parent you spend your whole life trying to protect your child from other dangers," she said. "You never would think you would have to protect your child from harming somebody else. That's what blew my mind. That was the hardest thing I had to stomach — was that my child harmed and killed people."

Crumbley continued: "Of course I look back … I've asked myself If I would have done anything differently," she said, pausing. "I wouldn't have."

Then her lawyer asked, her, "If you could change things, would you?"

"Absolutely," Crumbley responded. "I wish he would have killed us instead."

Crumbley, who has been jailed for 26 months since the shooting, was then asked whether she saw herself as a victim.

"I don't want to say that I'm a victim, because I do not want to disrespect those families that truly are the victims," she said. "But we lost a lot."

'We did a lot of things together. I trusted him.'

During the trial, the prosecution also presented evidence showing Ethan Crumbley texted extensively with a friend about asking his parents for help, but received none. In one message, he wrote that he had asked his dad to take him to the doctor, "but he just gave me some pills and told me to suck it up." In another he told his friend: "My mom laughed when told her"

"Was there ever a time when he asked for help and you laughed?" Smith asked Jennifer Crumbley on Thursday.

She said no and that her son never told her about hearing voices, nor did he ever ask her to go to a doctor.

Jennifer Crumbley testified that she thought she and her son "were pretty close."

"We would talk. We did a lot of things together. I trusted him. I thought I had an open door and that he could come to me," adding that she thought they were a tight family.

Jennifer Crumbley monitored her son's grades and had disciplinary issues with him, mainly about grades, but she "did not go through his text messages," she testified.

"I didn't have a reason to."

Crumbley returns to the stand Friday morning for cross-examination by the prosecution.

Contact Tresa Baldas: [email protected]

Contact Gina Kaufman: [email protected]. Follow her on X: @ReporterGina.